The Surreal Housewife Blog

During the half-time show at a recent Super Bowl party, someone within earshot of me said, “You know how I know I raised my kids right? They wouldn’t know who the fuck that is,” referring to Kendrick Lamar, who was performing on stage. I spent some … [Read more...]

To get straight to the point, I heard Matt McConaughey on a podcast recently, and the topic was relationships. He said his wife, Camila, serves him tea every morning because “her tea is the best.” That’s awesome! Incidentally, my husband makes the … [Read more...]

It’s taken me 45 years to rebuild my self-esteem since it broke off from the iceberg of my soul like a fragile, frozen splinter at the tender age of 13. So why do I continue to undermine my self-confidence on a daily basis? When will I learn to … [Read more...]

Recently, my husband and I decided to answer the question, what if marriages worked like the kitchen featured in the series, 'The Bear'? Note: If you haven’t watched The Bear, nor ever worked a dish pit, line, or front of the house, you may not … [Read more...]

I’m at an age when it feels natural to take stock of my life and sort out the decisions (and people) I would likely not make over again if I had the chance. Part of that process is forgiving myself for how I conducted myself once or twice. It’s … [Read more...]

In late 2022, I did something seemingly stupid and brilliant. Since then, it’s come to my attention that only a select few people understand my decision. I know right away who these understanders are because halfway through my first sentence of … [Read more...]

At 5:15 p.m. on a recent Monday, my husband asked me, “What time is dinner?” For some reason, it struck me as odd. After all, it’s a question that’s been asked one fucktrillion times in this house, though less often now that we are barren. I … [Read more...]

The last quarter of her junior year, and a pre-dawn drop off at the airport for an early Easter morning flight to her home 2000 miles away. A long, curbside hug goodbye after an extended visit home – three weeks instead of two. Tender admonitions, … [Read more...]

As my four technically grown children insist on continuing to get older - grow up as it were - I have no choice but to keep revisiting how this feels. What I have noticed recently is that the feeling won’t stay still long enough to actually put a … [Read more...]